No. No. No.
It was the day our second born, our son, Joseph Nicholas was born. Exactly 40 weeks ripe and ready, he came out of the womb a whoppin' 7 lbs 15 oz, but I like to round up to 8 lbs and 20 inches long! He was born at around 12 something pm. (Hey, it's been months since I blogged, so I am not focusing on the nitty gritty minutia that bore 10 of you MacrossKitty followers anyway.)
What's the reasoning behind naming him "Joseph Nicholas"? The whole naming thing was more complicated than I thought it would be. We didn't have this much trouble naming our daughter because there are so many pretty names to pick from. I'm biased. With boys, you really have to figure out a solid name that he will live up to. For the longest time, Erwil and I couldn't find a name that we both could agree on. Oh boy, it's a long story, but here's how it went down...
Do you have the time to read?
One rule. I had to respect Erwil's wishes. Ever since Erwil and I were seriously dating and talking about having kids, he's always wanted to name his firstborn son named after his favorite maternal grandfather Nicodemus. Erwil has nothing but good things to say about his Papang (grandpa). He has good, strong character traits as Erwil puts it. Many good memories comes to mind about his Papang.
Nicodemus? Sure, you can get away with all sorts of names in the Philippines. It's a population full of absurd names to begin with, just trust me on this one. But naming our son Nicodemus spells trouble here in America. Nothing out there flows with "Nicodemus" as a middle name. No middle name will compliment it either. I Google searched for boys names that might possibly work with it, but even Google couldn't help me. Nicodemus is one of those names that can only stand alone, by itself. It's the loner-name type of a name.
Also, I know that Nicodemus is a Pharisee who was interested in Jesus on the low key. How many mean kids at the playground know Bible trivia facts? I can already foresee our son will get his butt kicked by the preschoolers on the yard. He will be teased by all the cool kids, and not be able to find a date to his high school prom with that name. In life may encounter being teased and persecuted for all sorts of reasons, but as his mother, I want to spare the child at least one.
Why not make Nicodemus more hip sounding? Why not look for a name that resembles its derivative? How about Nicholas? I still stubbornly resisted Nicholas for two out of the three trimesters that I was pregnant. You can't blame me. All I could think of were the boys I encountered who were named Nicholas.
Nicholases are just the so-so kids. He is the one who hopelessly never memorizes his basic multiplication facts by the 5th grade, and pisses everyone off in his team whenever the kids play Math Challenge games for Laffy Taffy candy prizes. He always accidentally forgets his chicken nugget stained homework in his grandma's truck that was towed to the repair shop yesterday. He is the one who wet his pants while sitting at his desk and the teacher didn't know about it, until you happened to be the one to step in his secret pool of piss. He is the hyper-active one who picks his salty, garden slug variety of green boogers and makes a multi-layered mosaic of hardened boogers inside his pencil box.
Nicholases are "just eeewww" and do not exactly fall on the brightest section of the bell-shaped curve. He is that high schooler who sits beside you Algebra class flipping through adult magazines inside his three ring binder, drawing nothing but unabridged versions of female anatomy on his wide ruled notebook paper. He is the guy with big hairy ears who suffered from cystic acne, halitosis and obviously Bart Simpson behind his back for his major overbite. He is the one who's nacho cheese smelly gym socks are stashed in his backpack. He is the scrawny little gang banger who was caught with a gun at school and wound up in juvenile hall for being dumb enough to use it.
This is how I envision boys who are named Nicholas. Of course, let's not get carried away. This can't be true of every boy named Nicholas, but there are plenty enough living examples to traumatize me.
Eventually, the name Nicholas grew on me, the way I slowly began a liking to that medicinal aftertaste of diet soda. Erwil did some kind of psychology 101 mind trick on me. It was a brilliant scheme! He made me hear the name Nicholas or Nick enough times. Then he attached an object that draws emotion, like an ultrasound picture of a black and whitish shaped lima bean. Erwil referred to the baby's bedroom, the toys, all the baby's belongings to the unborn Nick. Eventually, I too, began calling the baby's belongings as Nick's room, Nick's clothes, Nick's baby clothes! My mind was slowly tweaked to liking "Nicholas" after being made endeared to it by my husband. So that's how our little boy ended up with Nicholas. For short, we call him Nick.
Our son's first name "Joseph" was the winner for a couple reasons. It's sentimental. Our son is named after my dad's youngest brother, Jose Pito, who tragically died in his 20's. Even though he was set to immigrate to America, he was the only Genuino sibling who never made it to New York City to live with the rest of the family. He died before I was even born. Every now and then my father and those who knew him spoke about how he looked like a Filipino moviestar, famous in the 70's. (No, they weren't talking about Joseph Estrada, who was an action moviestar turned corrupt criminal Philippine President.) Instead of being a forgotten name, it meant a lot to my dad to hear my late uncle being memorialized. Ok, enough with the weepy stuff...
I also really liked the name Joseph because in the Bible's Old Testament, Joseph (son of Jacob) was a man of integrity. You can't go wrong naming your son after someone of godly character despite living a hard life. (You'd have to read the life of Joseph in the book of Genesis before you agree with me.) Life is really difficult when you're trying to be someone different and good, but God will see you through in all circumstances. I love the life that Joseph lived--sold into slavery then rose to become the Egyptian Pharaoh's powerful right hand man. He did what's right in God's eyes, even if it was contrary to common belief. Will my son live up to his name? This will be revealed as he grows up to manhood.
For any parent, I bet it took quite some time to decide on a name most fitting for their son to live by. And, it's not the sound of the name that makes people drawn to loving or disliking our son. It's really the character that attaches to that name that will either build or break our son's reputation. What will our son be like? We're still in the process of figuring out who the little guy is and what he's going to do with his life. All things considered, I'm so blessed to have this little precious boy in my life.
Here's a photo of Nick only 2 days old. Look at the pair of dimples on his cheeks! You don't need me to go on Maury Povich's talk show to prove by DNA results that Erwil is the father.
Lastly, care to be inspired by writing a blog or two? I have some take-away questions for you readers...
- How did you decide what name to give your son/daughter?
- Have you thought of names to give your future kids?
- How did your parents come up with your name?
